Saturday, April 25, 2015

Sailing Through His Shift

Thomas worked yesterday and things went better than I thought they might. After lamenting the fact that he had to work the night before, I thought he might get really worked up and have a lot of trouble getting himself to work yesterday. He did wake up and spend a good part of the day anxious but he was a 2 or a 3 on a scale of 1-10 (10 being the worst anxiety ever) which isn't too bad. I left him alone for the late morning and afternoon to get my hair colored so I didn't know how he was going to do with me being gone.

When I came home, he was still at a 3 but he was hanging in there. I didn't want to question him too much about how he was feeling because I didn't want to plant things in his head that weren't there yet. I kept an eye on him though and he seemed to do pretty good. As the time grew closer to him having to go to work, I watched him watch the clock like a hawk but he didn't complain of feeling any worse.

As I drove him to work he seemed stressed out and we talked a little about how work might go and I asked him if he felt he would survive the evening. He said he thought he could so I left it at that. I couldn't help but wonder if I was going to hear from him before his shift was over asking to come home early. As the evening wore on, I realized he was going to be able to stay at work. I was so happy about that.

When I picked him up at 10 he was in a great mood and I asked him how work had gone. He said, "pretty good" and then went on to tell me that it was busy at first, then it died off, then it got busy again and then slowed down. I wondered how he did during the busy times and when I asked, he said he did fine. Go figure. Perhaps having the 2-3 weeks off was helpful for him. That and perhaps the increase in the clozaril helped. You just never know with this illness.

So, all in all things went well. I couldn't have asked for better as far as I am concerned. I feel like he really needs a break from all of the stress that work brings him and it turns out he sailed through his shift. I don't know when he works next but he should be back on the schedule regularly now.

With all of the anticipation of me being gone somewhere in the past now and with me not going anywhere else anytime soon, I'm hoping that he'll become more stable again. I say that with a knot in my gut because I just don't know what's coming down the pike next. Waiting for the next things is always torture. My hope is that we're looking at good times ahead for a while.

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