Monday, March 23, 2015

Residual Effects

I really have to wonder if Thursday's session somehow affected Thomas too. For the two days afterwards he was kind of distant from me and one of the things that went out the window was doing his Friday's With Tom post. I talked to him about it on Friday and Saturday and he said that he felt that he didn't want to disappoint me or you guys so he felt a sort of obligation to write. I thought that would be the end of it because I'm not about to push him into writing--I want it to be something he likes to do--so I kind of figured the days of Friday's With Tom were over.

Then yesterday he went to an Airsoft war that was quite a ways from here and took place in the mountains. He left at 6 a.m. and was gone until 3. Something about that trip seemed to refresh him in some way so I thought I would revisit the whole Friday's With Tom thing with him. I sat down and talked to him about it and told him how he makes such a difference in the world with his writing and I told him that this experience Airsofting in the next town in the mountains would make a great story to tell everyone.

He lit up!!

Because of that I told him that his blog is supposed to be fun for him. It's not supposed to be an obligation. I realized that writing about his Airsoft war was going to be fun for him so he was once again excited about writing. I also told him that he could write it any time he wanted and that I could set it to post on Friday's even if he got it done today. He liked that idea.

So, happily, I am announcing that Thomas will have a post for you all on Friday! He will be talking about his Airsoft war which sounded to me like a TON of fun. It was something that he had been looking forward to for a long time (this big war in a college town up in the mountains) and the last one had been rained out so finally we had a nice day and he was able to go. Apparently there is another one this Saturday and since he doesn't work, I imagine he'll be there too.

As for the residual effects from therapy and the distance between us, I was feeling pretty awful about that. I didn't like us walking around like two ships passing in the night. Hugs dropped off to next to none and even after saying there was no tension in the house before therapy, after therapy, there was. The night before his Airsoft war I was saying good night to him and I did the mother thing and began to issue instructions.

"Be sure you wear your seatbelt."

Which was met with,

"I know, I always do!!!!"

and I said "never mind" to him and I said "good night" and walked away. My heart was broken, I didn't want to leave the night behind with any conflict. I didn't have any plans of waking up early with him, instead thinking he needed to be independent from me and get through a morning alone where no one was up but him. I woke up, however, and came out to see him and give him a hug. That's when he asked me to make his breakfast smoothie and I happily did that, sneaking in extra flax (fiber) and protein powder. I wanted his day to get off to a good start. After making the smoothie he came into the kitchen and asked for a hug and all of the residual "ick" of the last couple days after therapy was gone and I held him so tightly.

So, last night was a beautiful night. We were "us" again. Oh how I had missed him! I'm not sure what I could have done to change the days after therapy but I am thankful for the fun of the Airsoft war and for waking up and making him a smoothie. They broke the ice and he and I are now good.

Thank God.

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