Wednesday, August 21, 2013

What's Supposed To Happen, Happens

The meds appointment went well yesterday and Thomas and I came away from it, our relationship unscathed. I did what I didn't want to do but will always do and that is to tell his meds doc about the delusions that Thomas has been dealing with lately. I stressed all morning until the appointment about how I was going to slip it into the conversation and I debated if it was even worth mentioning. I also considered doing what I usually do and that is to discuss the topic with Thomas before the appointment. In the end, I did what I have always done since Thomas became sick and that is to trust my gut, so I waited.

I told his meds doc about the weird episode Thomas had with his physical health on Saturday and we began piecing together what might have caused that. In amongst all of the possibilities it came up that it might have been severe anxiety and when that possibility arose, I realized my door to talking about the delusions was miraculously opened right before me. We talked about how Thomas had been at the same house a week before and there had been a big fight between his friend and his friend's father and how that had caused Thomas some distress and then we thought perhaps the physical symptoms we were guessing about were from anxiety about being in that same situation.

Then since we were busy pinning all of this on anxiety I took the opportunity to tell the meds doc about the discussion Thomas and I had on our way up to his friend's house which brought worsening delusions to my attention. I asked Thomas if I could speak freely with his doc and I told him that he could tell me if I was off base with my thoughts and he gave me permission. Bless his heart, he always gives me permission. Not only that, he is always honest about what I say and admits freely to anything I say that is in line with HIS truth.

I sat there with a racing heart and I told his meds doc about what Thomas and I had talked about and I hypothesized out loud that perhaps the panic symptoms might have been exacerbated by our heated conversation on the way to his friend's. Thomas admitted that the conversation had upset him but he didn't think that it was related to his strange physical symptoms.

There it was, laid bare for all to hear, everything I had been worried about saying. Here we all were and the truth was out there and the doc now knew that Thomas was still struggling with delusions and I could rest because I had done what needed to be done and that was to make the doc aware of what Thomas had been struggling with. At that point I shut my mouth and let the two of them hash things out and it turns out that things had been worse than I had thought. So, thank God I had spoken up.

In the end, without my input, Thomas and his doc agreed that he should increase his meds a little bit. I am happy with the decision because the increase isn't drastic so there shouldn't be too many new side effects to deal with and hopefully those nasty delusions will be slowed down some. As for the strange physical symptoms that Thomas had on Saturday, we all came to the conclusion that it had been dehydration so Thomas is going to try and start drinking even more water now.

Since Thomas has gotten sick and the whole march through the psych/medical system has commenced, what's supposed to happen has happened just as it should and yesterday's appointment is proof of that. Between Thomas, myself and his meds doc we have made quite a good team working towards better mental health for Thomas.

As for yesterday? Whew!!! That's all I've got to say to that.

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