Saturday, May 25, 2013

Sundown

As the day comes to a close after a beautiful sunny day sitting in the same room with my son while we each worked at our computers, I find myself a little uneasy about the night ahead. I see worrisome signs in his behavior and I can't help but cast a skeptical eye on every movement of his and every word from his mouth. I know that this feeling will subside eventually and I just have to let things settle down, both inside of me and outside, in the rooms he and I share. The static electricity of my worry raises the hair on my scalp and arms as I listen for his footsteps on the stairs or see the hunched over, secretive posture he holds as he walks by the living room that indicates something isn't right.

Will I ever not be on alert? How many nights will we have to live through without incident before I can stop worrying? These are questions whose answers lie within time passing, I know, but time

s-l-o-w-l-y goes by. One moment, one breath held, one jump at an out of the ordinary sound all mark time until everything's ok again.

For tonight though, I drift off in my chair in front of the TV into a fitful sleep and wrap myself up in a blanket and pretend, like I did when I was young, that the blanket is my armor that nothing and no one can penetrate.

Good night all and may you have a peaceful evening and a good night's sleep.


1 comment:

  1. I hear you! I have a child like this too. Yikes.

    ReplyDelete

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